virginia tech killing, drama and organ donation

Virginia tech killings

well, most ppl will have heard of it by now the killings. I was watching taiwan news e other day abt the killings. anyway they were saying china was being low profile, b4 they know it was a korean who did it. cos there were accusations that the person was a china national. it was wrong reporting on a tv station part. but well china heave a sign of relief when they realised it wasn't their people. Ok this is not the main pt at all.

This korean guy seems to be very disturbed. He sent a package to the television station saying that he did this because he was being discrimintated ( this is how i interpretated it, when he said that he want to take revenge on the rich). Well it seems like most channels like cnn, cnbc have not been saying much abt y he felt discriminated. I m not surprised. cos it seems that racial discrimination, and discrimination of any kind could be quite common in the states.

How could someone who is so mentally ill. so many cries for attention, so many cries for help. and yet no1 noticed all these signs. no1 went to his help. counselling is often not enough to help her person. he must have felt this world is such a cold place, such an evil place that he did sth so terrible. I m not trying to say wat he did is justifiable. because killing anyone, even in an act of self defense is not justifiable. Instead of blaming him we should have see, wat we could do to make this world a better place, less discriminating, more sympathetic, more concern towards each other.

i was watching cnn. there was reporting that korean students studying in us, their parents have been asking them to go back to korea, as they were afraid that some unhappy people will take revenge on their kids over this incident. well, haven't there been enough killings done. stop revenging! stop racial discriminating!

Organ donation
At 21, we r able to donate our organs to needy patients, if we pass away. Well this is a good plan, but recently read in the newpaper that some youngster r opting out of this system. and the people opting out are people fr our age grp. gosh.. when i heard it i was a bit disgusted. If u r dead wat use would this organ be to u? y must u be so selfish and take it with u? wouldn't it be good if it could bring someone else life and hapiness?

Some people's excuses for not donating it is because, they don't know who is receiving the organ transplant. it might be someone evil, someone who done a lot of bad things. they feel that if they do so it will bring sufferings to their people. I jus feel that, that is a lousy excuse. Saving anyone is a good thing. If that person is bad, and even after being given a second chance at living he still does bad things, that is his own problem. he is accountable to himself! and besides i believe there will be retribution. if this person is that evil, he will still suffer retribution somehow.

dramas
hahahaha.. this is the most irrelevant topic today. ahh.. so many nice jap drama coming out. daisakusen (proposal), liar game, bambino. watched the first episode of liar game it was not bad. i m still waiting for proposal and bambino eng sub. bambino looks like a delicious show and proposal, seems to have a high rating and it seems quite romantic.

liar game
It is abt a really honest girl (honest till the extent of naive) is selected for a game. this game is called the liar game. each contestant is give 100million yen, and they have to con the other party (contestant) of the 100million yen. if they do not succeed they will have to pay the 100million yen by hook or by crook. if they succeed of course they will get more than 100million yen. really interesting!!! the first episode is still alright. the actress acting in it is the death note lady. hahahah.. i don't know her name in death note she is the whiny singer, the really cute one. the actor is the actor fr hana yori dango (liu xing hua yuan jap version) i think he is not rei or dao ming si. he is the one of the other 2. i can't rmb their names. hahahah.. anyway, the jap version of hana yori dango 2 is quite nice. i think it is better than the taiwan one, cos it progress faster.

Bambino
seems like a delicious show. but honestly don't know wat it is abt. i think it is abt a guy who wants become a chef or sth. staring song ben ren (arashi member he acted as dao ming si in hana yori dango)

proposal
really romantic. abt a guy and a girl have been frens since young. and the guy liked the girl since young. now that they grew up, the girl is getting married. and well the guy will try to win her back before her wedding. i know v cliche.. but well i love cliche dramas.. hahhaha.. will tell ur wat i feel after watching it...

air pollution

u know yest i was saying that i rather die of air pollution than sound pollution. well it really happened at nite. e temple near my house was burning incense the whole night thru. and seriously the smoke was thick. now everything still smell of incense. gosh and my throat is being irritated by all this. having a sore throat now. gosh.. and the drilling is starting again now. hai... damn irritating

going deaf!

shit, i think i m goin to become deaf. ahhh.. making me very tense and angry. the noise pollution u have to suffer cos u r living in a hdb flat. gosh... don't know which hse is doin renovation work. really noisy. can literally feel the vibration from the loud sound. hai.. jus wanted to complain. i really can't study in this noise. but recently it is always raining so i don't want to go out to study too.. shit.. hopefully their renovation works end soon. or else i might be driven crazy by the noise. hai.. i jus wonder is there any way to make flats more sound proof. always so attacked by noise pollution. I hate noise pollution more than air pollution. i rather die fr breathing difficulties, than die deaf..

birthdays...

Updates first!

ok last tue me and sl went shopping. we spent our sakae bday voucher tgth. yup.. we went back to sakae to eat. then anyway saw one of the kitchen staff. auntie mary.. anyway i think auntie mary didn't recognise us, but well i kept looking at her that's y she came over. she can't rmb our names. ok amanda is a bit hard for aunties to remember. but well. told us to go work there. hahhaha.. no thanks.

anyway la assis manager asking me to go back. but well i keep telling her no. hai.. i jus wonder if i sld go back during the holi to work. Realised there really problematic. cedric received 2 warning letter for stupid reasons. wat the hell. i jus wonder wat that bitch is telling the manager. in the past when me and teresa were around, the manager would ask our opinion on things. i guess now she got no1 to trust anymore so she must trust that bitch. another thing is that karmila went back to work. she is another trouble maker. will sow discord between both side, and well bitch abt ppl behind their backs. really disgusting. this kind of ppl sld jus rot in hell. I think this new parttimers r really problematic, they r really too lazy and don't know how to suck up to the manager. and seriously they don't know how to protect themselves. not that teresa and i r that great. but well we really think that maybe if we were around there won't be that much problem in the shop now. even after i leave that place, still couldn't get totally not involve. still must listen to this shitty politics. hai.. really so free ah.

last sat, i went out with teresa. well it was quite fun. we took neoprint. haven't take neoprint for ages! didn't know neoprint price increased so much. hee.. anyway it was quite fun being out with her. it is really weird. though we don't have work as a common topic anymore we still can crap like crazy.. hahahah.. i m really glad that i have her as a fren. well hopefully we can be frens forever. i don't like the feeling that, when we were working or for some reasons interact with each other, get close to each other. then cos we r not interacting anymore, become distant won't keep in contact. though i don't like automatically contacting ppl, but i like ppl to contact me once a while. hahhaha.. i don't want to be strangers with ppl, i was once so close to.

ok ok, anyway back to the main topic. birthdays. yest, when we were going for jap class, sl told me a bad news. she not celebrating her bday anymore! won't have singing competition. hee.. i was still practicing for it la. it is cos her frens like not v enthu. keep giving exams as excuse. hello. how much time will this cost u.. wat a spoilsport. anyway, feel kinda sad. i think u would want ppl to treat u nice, but these ppl treat u like shit. wa lao. really damn pissed off! gosh gosh, wat sld i do to surprise her? hahaha.. have some ideas le, but haven't execute it. must really find time to do it. anyway, i think to most ppl, birthdays are v impt. bday are the best time to show sincerity to ur frens. and when u don't feel that u will get upset. so completely can understand how she feel. hai hai..

oh ya on a lighter note. sl bro jus came back fr taiwan. hee.. he went carrefour. me and sl were saying how come we didn't c carrefour at all in taiwan. anyway she said her bro bought happy books. then i was like wat is happy books? hahahah.. then she told me it is those kind of books v spiritual de, abt religion, and well how to be optimistic. hahahha.. one book title v funny. 佛不是佛，你不是你. hahhaha.. anyway it was sth like that. then sl and her sis were saying her brother becoming a deity, going to fei xiang tian. hahaha.. really tot this book will be read by an old man. but her bro like reading this. hahahhaa.. so weird. but well her bro is a nice and good guy, i guess. reading this kind of books won't make u bad u know.. hahahah

ok anyway yest was cindy bday. the chilli sotong v nice! anyway it was ok la. anyway, xw's bf drove me and elin home. hahahaha.. so fun. so envious of them they so sweet tgth! he parked at the president parking lot. so funny la.. anyway when they reached my place, i didn't unlock the door then tried to get out. somehow got stuck in the car. hahahha.. but well must thank them again.. really sweet.

rise in govt's pay

there has been a lot of talks on this issue. I m here to share my view of this issue.

Honestly, i m not very happy with the price hike, and now with the rise in govt pay?! first tot was WTH!!! This two issues might be independent of each other, but seriously this is a wrong time to announce this issue. It will only make civilians unhappy.

First thing, the govt is already very highly paid. so y do they have to get a pay rise, when mere civilians work for a yr, that is their monthly pay.

Secondly, won't this widen the rich and poor gap?! The rich are only getting richer, and wat are they doing to help the poor? While the rich bask in luxury, the poor, slave for their survival.

During the bad times, we had a pay cut. now during the good times we have prices hike and rise in govt pay. And the funny thing is, if i didn't remember wrongly, during the recession, the opposition talked about having a govt pay cut, but somehow it was overthrown, as they want to prevent corruption in the govt. hmmm... isn't this a bit ridiculous. shouldn't the govt already be cleaner than clean. isn't this a way of getting money in without being corrupted explicitly? corruption is defined as dishonest proceedings, in other words to get money thru dishonest proceedings, but now the only difference is they are getting money thru honest proceedings. isn't it the same? jus that they found a way to justify getting more pay. (ok i know this is a maybe defamatory sentence, but seriously not intended to slander anyone)

Seriously is this to attract talents into politics? If i were to be in politics not because of the pay but because i want to be of service to our citizens. seriously is this too idealistic? To be competitive with the private sector. doesn't seem like a sound argument to me. so is the govt a profitable organisation now?!

I feel that it is useless to feel unhappy or to even voice out our opinion as wat i m doing now. bcos somehow, we know it is useless. Though the govt is being transparent, but they haven't been listening to voices of the public. so wat is is the point of being transparent. to me they are telling me, i m jus informing u i m goin to do this. if u don't understand i will explain, but even if u understand and is unhappy about it, it is not possible for me to change it. one day i jus wonder whether i will be driven to support the opposition party. but i will support the opposition not because i think they r capable of running the country (not trying to say they are not capable, but well it haven't been proved and tested) but jus to show my unhappiness about some govt policies, and to remind them, i m unhappy with them.

jolin's concert!

Went to jolin concert with sl! quite fun! met her at clementi to have dinner. saw the opp class ppl. hahah.. was considering if i should pretend not to know them, cos a bit weird, since i don't really know them but well jus recognise them cos they r elin, lp and wm's (basically in short our class ppl) frens. but well it seems like mw recognised me so like a bit bad to pretend not to know who they r. actually it was kind of gan ga. luckily i got a bowl of noodles to go back to. hee..

then well after that we headed for the concert. basically jus follow the crowd managed to get there. in e hall they were giving out those inflatable things and postcards. we were not supposed to bring in water bottle, but cos i didn't know and i was quite afraid that i wld scream myself hoarse, i brought a bottle of water. anyway, there was this bag check area, then i jus open my bag, b4 i knew it e bottle of water was confiscated. gosh the security was really fast. he didn't even ask me to take it out! he jus took it out for me! gosh... don't know wat to say. anyway was in a daze. then this woman started hitting me. i was like wat the hell y is this woman hitting me.. hahhaha.. then after really long realised it was me and sl ex colleague. hahaha.. really funny she was asking 你门坐哪里？ then i replied we not working now.. hahaha.. she was like i m really out of the point. realised she was out with the kitchen ppl. so weird la... i was like ai.. xiao qiang... hahhahaha.. fortunately they still recognise us.. i really didn't want to pretend not to know them, but it took me rather long to register who they r cos really long didn't c them, well and oso bcos my reaction really slow sometimes la...

it is really diff to c jolin perform live and on tv... on tv u can't really c the actual "fear" of the stunt! it was like when she hanging upside down her legs were super straight.. wa!!!!! i can't even do sit and reach properly.. hahahaha then she really can dance and well. it is not an experience that is describable. then it is also the atmosphere of the concert. the sing along... really fun! but wat a waste it was only 2 hours long. this is the first concert i pay for. most concert i go to have someone wld have free tic. remember the last concert me and mh went zao bao concert. hahaha.. we ended up sitting on the floor chatting...but quite fun oso la.. i supposed it is not wat u r watching and more of who u r with.

Tuesdays with morrie

This is a really good book fr mitch albom. his other good book that i enjoyed reading very much is the five ppl u will meet in heaven. Both books are very inspirational books. I would say they are very idealistic books, and would remind us to be human. I tried sleeping after reading this book, but well i couldn't. my emotions and thoughts wouldn't stop flowing. and in case i forget it tmr, i have to pen it down now. in case this entry gets incoherent, it is because, well, my tots are really jumbled out now. Couldn't find the right words to express myself.

This book really made me cry, jus like the other one. not because it is a sad book, ok it some sense it was sad. but well i was really touched, and somehow depressed. depress that the situation is too idealistic, we would most likely not be able to achieve it.

In case u don't know wat this book is about. it is about morrie, mitch albom's lecturer is dying fr a disease. Morrie taught mitch life greatest lessons. Before morrie dies, he will once again remind mitch, of wat life really is all about. i know it sounds dull. but believe me it is really interesting and touching.

The book talk about many issues. one of them i personally feel strongly about is the issue on culture. I realised that we, the youngester these days are having more self culture. In other words, we r growing more selfish. I seriously feel this way. To me, selfishness is grouped into 3 category:

Category A: People who help others unconditionally.
Category B: People who offers a helping hand, expect help when needed in return, but will be grateful for help.
Category C: People who jus expect help, nv giving anything in return. They feel that it is ur obligation to help them. They are so involved in their own world, that they failed to realise this. (this is not targetted at anyone, if u happen to read this and think is amanda talking about me. It is most likely u fall into this category, and have a conscience for realising it. If you feel guilty, good! There is still hope! If you read this and think, "well this is jus me, i m selfish!" Well my advice to u is go rot in hell, u r hopeless forget it, jus enjoy life being selfish now and go rot in hell in the future. hahahha.. oh no.. suddenly so angry)

i think when i was younger and more naive i was in cat a, then when i started working and realised how realistic this world is, i moved to cat B. Maybe recently due to circumstances have fallen into cat c.. hahaha.. hope not!

An example for this would be when i worked at la, i kind of keep helpin this junior. but somehow she turned her backs on me and backstab me one day. i really cried hard. Didn't understand how cos someone en jia chou bao. but well fr that incident, moved fr a cat a person to become a cat b person. I think a cat b person is selfish in the sense that, she doesn't want to get hurt. So u will only repay kindness with kindness, when she feels kindness. And i suppose this is an art of self defence. i think most ppl fall in this cat ba..

Fortunately there r still cat A ppl around. i remember elin(in case it was some other person who tell me this i m sorry, but fr my impression it was elin telling me this) telling me. i think it is her dad would donate money to those auntie begging for money. then i was telling her that those ppl r conman. then she said, her dad feels that, if that old lady comes begging at such an old age, there must be a reason for her doin so. felt a bit enlighten, but not totally. bcos some of them r really cheats, the clementi blind man can c me still pretend to be blind. quite angry that he cheated my money. anyway, recently heard someone say the same thing. the will jus donate to those beggers. again i asked the same question, won't they be afraid to get cheated. This time i was truly enlightened. The answer was, if these beggers are cheat, they are responsible for their own actions, we cannot control them, jus have faith that we are doin good. U C!!! kind ppl do exist, at first i tot they were silly ppl, but i feel enlighten now.. hahaha...

I think that we have became less humane, when we start living in the "adult world" we get really practical. and sometimes forget the little act of kindness. someone once siad don't be too naive, to live in the adult world u have to play by the rules of the game. well, it is ok to play by the rules, but we can't lose ourselves in this game completely. The book really serve as a wakeup call to people who stand by these rules.